rotation diet while breastfeeding



today on moms everyday -- kellie murphy: by profession i'm a social worker. i've got background in doing child protective service work. i had no idea,no inkling. a family shares their experience with shaken baby syndrome. plus -- i don't want themto feel pressure. they're little children. they need to play andthat's how they learn.

our panel of moms talk about thepressure we put on our children. and we're making mom's life easier with meal planning strategies. it's all next on moms everyday. >> we're making moms life easier one small victory at a time. moms everyday, a show made by moms for moms. nicole: so one ofthe hottest topics new moms are talkingabout today is how soon can i get my kidsstressed out and overscheduled?

[laughter] pam: exactly,it feels that way. nicole: i tell themimmediately, you know. liz: well, thatmakes me feel better. pam: as soon asthey're infants, get them scheduledinto a baby class. nicole: you really have toget them used to the fact that if they don'tmeet very, very high unrealistic expectations forlanguage and social skills,

that you just -- we won't love them andthey won't be okay. pam: it's so --it's ridiculous but honestlyit's so true. you feel like a bad mom. like when my kids arein high school now and i hear otherparents listing off -- he's taking a.p. this anda.p. that and a.p. this and i'm like, well mine'staking gym and pottery.

nicole: right. amy: it's kind of thatcompetition among parents too. i think sometimesour kids are pawns that we're using as wecompete with other parents as we're hearing the collegesthey're applying to, the a.p. classes thatthey're taking or even going back toelementary school, whether they're reading, whether they canwrite their name.

so you know, in a way,it's kind of on us. pam: yeah, it's ourpride and joy, literally. liz: we have totake a step back because it is toomuch too soon. my kids are preschool age soi'm already feeling pressure to make sure they know,you know, the alphabet and their numbers and theircolors and all this stuff so they're preparedfor school, but i feel pressure and i don'twant them to feel pressure.

>> right. liz: but it's still tough. pam: but then when youtake them to kindergarten and the mom next to you is like,well, he's gonna need to be in a class because he'sreading chapter books. and you're like, well, mineknows his abcs, does that count? amy: and he'sfluent in mandarin. nicole: my son wiped allby himself yesterday. pam: exactly.

we found both shoes! nicole: and i thinktoo it's sort of your internal expectations andvalues because sometimes when you're feeling guilty,i think it's good to examine whether or not it's becausethese are your values and maybe you're not doingwhat you want to be doing for your kids. maybe you are beinga little lazy as mom because you really don't wantto get out of the house.

you know, and ithink that's both. because i know i found thatwhen my kids were little, i wanted to be doing more withthem but then i was like, it's so much work,you know, and money, and i had to find the happymedium between what would be a good harmonyfor our family. elisha: my ten-year-old,who's in the fourth grade, last year thehomework was insane and i just had toput a stop to it

because it was ruiningour relationship. >> your life. elisha: yeah, and franklyschool is not his thing and it's just notgonna be his thing and so for me to pushthat and make that such a high priority -- not to saythat i'm like, "oh, don't worry about school,"because i do care, but that's not where heshines and i feel like

to push that on him wouldbring down the parts that he does shine in andso i was like, that's it. i'm done with thisover-homework thing. dinner time, it's done,and we have family time. the stress is over forthe rest of the day. pam: momma knows best. choosing child care is oneof the biggest decisions new parents can make. kellie murphy andneil czarnecki

thought they had madea great decision when they chose the woman whowatched their older daughter to watch theirnew baby. unfortunately, that decisionhad devastating consequences. like any other first grader, krue czarnecki is learning to read. krue: stay here, biscuit. dogs go to school. woof!

works on his math -- krue: 11, 12, 13, 14 -- and goofs around with his family. [laughing] at first glance it may not be obvious that krue has been through an unimaginable ordeal. krue was a victim ofshaken baby syndrome, also known asabusive head trauma when he was tenmonths old.

so that was january 13thof 2010, happened by our day careprovider in black river falls. krue has a cortical visionimpairment as a result of being shaken as well asleft-sided paralysis -- his left armand left leg. he wears orthotics onboth feet for walking. he has field cuts in hisvision, so for example, if he looks down, hedoesn't always see. he has to sometimeslook around.

he has a partially dislocatedleft hip due to the tone, the tightness on theleft side of his body has gradually pulledthat hip out of place. we're looking at some prettymajor surgery coming up for him. liz: since that fateful day in 2010, krue's family has done everything in their power to give back what was taken from him. anything that we felt wasnoninvasive and could possibly help krue, we attempted if wecould manage it financially.

liz: never in a million years did the wisconsin family think that their world could be flipped upside down because of one act. one bad decision has led to a lifetime of challenges for the whole family. >> by profession,i'm a social worker. i've got background in doingchild protective service work. you know, so i just knowfrom professional trainings some things to be awareof and to maybe look for.

i had no idea, no inkling,no feeling, no red flags that this was somethingthat was on board for us. that's the hardestpart to swallow is this didn'thave to happen. and it's a moment in timewhere someone decided to let themselves go. liz: krue's parents have made it a point to focus on their son, not the woman accused of hurting him who eventually reached a plea deal and was ordered to pay restitution.

neil: i truly believe, you know, our attitude and how we handle this is going to be thebest result for krue. so many times you want to focuson the person that did this, and it's easy to do that. everybody does that. it's the first thinganybody ever asks you when you tell them the story,what happened to her? the reality is, whatever happensto her, it doesn't fix krue.

only we can fix krue. liz: 12-year-old karsen has also had to make sacrifices for the family. she has found on outlet in martial arts and recently earned a black belt in kokido. it has helped -- it teaches me a lot moreself-control, i guess, and to respect othersin different ways. i'd be a totally differentperson if i never was in kokido.

i've been doing it for sevenyears, ever since he got hurt. my parents got me into itwhen i was in first grade so that i wouldn't feel leftout with all the troubles that they werehaving with him. and it's a reallyawesome thing to be in. kellie: she's an awesome sister. so count one up from six. liz: meanwhile krue continues to amaze his parents with his progress and happy outlook on life.

he's overcome so much. i mean, he's a reallysocial, happy little guy. liz: the couple is devoted to shaken baby syndrome awareness and prevention and hope parents and caregivers will take the time to learn about abusive head trauma and ways to cope with the stress that comes along with parenting. kellie: as far as misconceptions go, i think there's a belief that people not only think that this happens

by mom's boyfriend or a younger male person. they don't normally associate itwith an older female caretaker or a parent. but it does happen. shaken baby syndromeand abusive head trauma is 100% preventable and ismost often triggered by inconsolable crying. but it is never okayto shake a baby. just a few seconds of vigorousshaking or a blunt blow

to the head can cause lifealtering consequences or even death to a child. here are some tips courtesy ofthe centers for disease control and prevention. if you are a parent or caregiver, know that infant crying is worstin the few first months of life but it does get better. try calming a crying baby byrocking, singing, taking a walk with a stroller, or going for a drive in the car.

if the baby won't stop crying, check for signs of illness and call the doctor if you suspect the child is sick. if you are getting upset, focus on calming yourself. put the baby safely in his or her crib and leave the room. check on the baby every five to ten minutes. call a friend or relative or a hotline for support. finally, never leave your baby with a person who is easily irritated or has a temper or history of violence. do you know about twitch?

your teen probably does. we're gonna tell you whatyou should know about this extremely popularwebsite on "the motherboard." meet our panelists: pam tauscher-- moms everyday host in madison, producer, and mother of two. amy byrnes-- blogger at "a my name is amy" and mother of four.

elisha wilson-beach-- arts educator, mother of four, and stepmother of four. nicole knepper-- licensed clinical counselor, writer, liz hayes-- executive producer and mother of two. ♪ you may not haveheard of twitch but if you have a teen in thehouse, they probably have.

twitch is a website whereyou can watch people play video games or broadcastyour own video game play. twitch also broadcasts contentrelated to video gaming. it's so popular that amazonbought it for $970 million. twitch is now hoping toget members to move from video game streams toin real life streams. twitch says it has turned intoa social platform for users and it's a platform thatmost parents are kind of clueless about.

with the new areasof the site, it's gonna focus on sharinglife outside of video gaming called twitch irl--in real life-- designed to be a vlog platformwhere users can go live or upload recorded videosof pretty much anything and everything thatthey're interesting in. so what do you need to knowas a parent about twitch? well twitch was founded in2011 and reportedly claims over 100 millionmonthly unique users

and 2.1 million peoplebroadcasting on the site. in some cases, teensare spending hours, like an average of 20 hoursa week on sites like twitch. twitch has a chat feature,that's important to know, that they can chatbetween each other and users live stream so there'ssome unfiltered language that might be of aconcern for you. twitch allows users tostream their own games from their own systems aswell so parents should know

if their kids are streamingand discuss the guidelines they find appropriate. if you're concerned about atwitch channel your kid wants to watch, it's best to watchit for a good 15 minutes to get a senseof it yourself and if you think it'ssafe for your teen. that's the motherboard,i'm rebecca regnier. staying organized and planningahead for weekly meals is a challenge for lotsof moms, including me.

today i get some greattips from busy mom and food bloggeralice choi. pam: hi, we'rewith alice choi, food blogger athip foodie mom, and it's so hard to stayorganized and plan ahead for the week. i've tried lotsof different ways. alice: yes. >> you're a busy mom.

how do you do it? alice: honestly, it'sa lot of prep work, it's a lot of planning to figure out whatyou're gonna feed your family that week, to write up a grocerylist and you just have to dedicate the time to do it. pam: and you dothat every week? alice: i do.

some people like to doeverything over the weekend like the parentswho work full-time. pam: sure. alice: the weekend is theonly time that have to do it. i have -- i work from home soi'm able to do it on monday and then i kind of planthe week that week and then i can domake ahead meals, i can do prep work kind ofthroughout the week as i go. but no matter howyou do it, like,

you're making food athome for your family, you're planningout your meals, you're saving money becauseyou're not going out as much, and you're hopefully makingyour family healthier meals. pam: right, because you'readding in the nutritional value rather than justdrive thru. alice: right, right. pam: so let's talk about,you have great ideas for the method toyour madness, huh?

show me whatyou're working on. alice: yes, so i start off,i love writing things down. i'm a very visual person. i have to kind ofsee it written down. i start off with ourweekly meal plan. i think about what i want tofeed my family that week. i have a number of go-to mealsthat i know my kids are gonna eat and i'msure you have those too. pam: yep, absolutely.

alice: we all do. pam: yep. alice: so those kind of gointo the rotation, you know, every week, every other week. alice: then i do like tointroduce some new things, but i figure out whatwe're gonna make, i write out myweekly meal plan. pam: okay. alice: if you need, like,to find recipe inspiration,

buy a cook book, watch acooking show, go online. there's so manyrecipe blogs online. pam: a million placesto look. alice: yeah, yeah. so many resources. so i write it out, and theni write out my grocery list. right there at the sametime while you're doing it, you do the grocery list? all the planningi do on one day.

alice: and i think if youjust do it all in one day, you'll get it done, you'll feelgood, you'll have it done. alice: the key thing aboutgrocery shopping and making your list, i think is writingyour grocery shopping list according to what sectionyou're going to. so like for example, all myproduce i write in one section. alice: all of my dairy,all of my meat, it helps you stay moreorganized and also as you're physically walkingthrough the grocery store,

you're shoppingmore efficiently. pam: and i like thesetools you're using. these work for you. obviously there's a lot ofthings you can find online for that type of thing. alice: absolutely. pam: but once you findone that works for you and you stick to it,that's key. that's key that helpsyou to be successful.

this has worked for me soi write everything down, i go grocery shopping, i have everythingthat i need, and then i cookthroughout the week. so i have a to-do listthat i do every day. so in here i also incorporatethe kid's activities, if i need to pick up somethingfrom the pharmacy or whatever, or drop off somethingfor girl scouts, i write everything on here asmy to-do list and, you know,

i think meal planning in generalcan be a little bit intimidating at first, but what itell all my friends who want to start doing it,you don't have to cook like every nightof the week. like, take some nights off,order pizza, order takeout. like, if you're cookingthree, four times a week, that's a big winin my book. pam: yes. and you're moreintentional about it

rather than at the lastminute, grabbing drive thru. alice: right, exactly. pam: all right. these are great ideas. i'm inspired. i think i can do this. alice: oh, good. pam: thank you, alice. for more ideas to makemom's life easier,

check out momseveryday.com. liz: going back to work afteri had my daughter was really, really difficult for me. and i was so stressed outbecause i was a breastfeeding mom but she would nottake a bottle at all, she just wouldn't take it. and, you know,being a new mom, i was like i can'tdeal with this. i don't know what to do.

i mean, i'm in tears,i'm so stressed out. i called my boss andi'm like, i can't do it. i can't come in andanchor the weekend news. i can't do it. pam: i just can't come. liz: and he was like,okay, he's like, "take as much timeas you need." pam: well, thankgoodness for that. liz: i felt so supported andit all worked out in the end

but it's like such achallenge, that time. pam: it does -- maternity leaveis such a short period of time but doesn't it feel like itwas triple the amount of time sometimes of the work? not necessarily the amountof time you needed, but the amount you're tryingto cram into that space, it's like you're tryingto do six months of work in however short amountof time you have. it's hard.

nicole: it depends. pam: with a new babyand hormones raging. nicole: it depends on howyou define maternity leave because my maternity leavewas six years. so i had a lot of time tocram in all the things because i didn't go back towork full-time for a long time. i had enough time tocram in all the things, and i wanted less time tocram in all the things. pam: the grass isnot always greener.

nicole: not always, it justdepends on what you want. pam: yeah. amy: i had thesame experience. i took some time off betweenmy first and my third child and then when mythird was about two, i decided to go backto work full-time. i was doing somethingthat i loved. i was so fulfilledprofessionally, but then it was a strugglebecause, you know,

it's a totally differentexperience in being the mommy home all day, and it was wheni got the phone call at work, when my daughterwas at day care, she was the third, sassy two,stood up on a picnic table to stick her tongueout at somebody. slipped, banged her face onthe picnic table, uh-huh, and her tongue waslike a split hot dog. >> oh my! amy: and that was really --that really made me step back

and question, you know,do i -- even though i'm so fulfilled,i don't know. i didn't feel like i was beingthe mom that i wanted to be at that time. pam: that was a game changer. amy: that was a game changer. elisha: i went back part-timeafter my first child because i was doing workthat i really loved, and i wanted to do it.

and i was pumping even though my kid wasnot taking any bottles, i was still trying, so i'm in a multipurposedance room, because i taught dance,pumping -- squawk, squawk, squawk -- and in walks likea third grader and i turn around and thepoor kid's face is like aah! pam: sorry i mortified you.

elisha: didn't meanto traumatize -- i'm traumatized too. i'm sorry. it's really, really importantwhen you're talking to kids that, you know, themessages to reiterate is it is my job to keep yousafe and it's never too late to tell me anything and if somebodytricks you or threatens you, it's not your faultand i can help. it's never toolate to tell,

and it's neveryour fault. so i think it's "i'm gonna believe youand it's not your fault." when the chaos of it all feelslike it's taking over your life

rotation diet while breastfeeding,just remember, one dayyou might miss all this. check us out on facebook,instagram, and twitter. see you next week. captions provided by:caption solutions, llcwww.captionsolutions.com